Decision deciding?

There are no solutions, only trade offs.

You've got a nasty bite... what's it like?

Imagine a snake, any snake...

Do you believe this snake hunts down humans? Like it directly seeks them out? I think we can all agree, no, otherwise snakes would be banging on our doors trying to get in.

Ok, now imagine yourself as that snake... What are you doing all day? Doing snake things like lying around, looking around, finding shelter getting warm, looking for food, looking for a mate, having snake babies...

Cool, doesn't sound too far from the average human year...

Keep imagining yourself as this snake.

Now you're minding your own business and a human steps on your tail.... what do you do?

Probably lashes out and goes to bite the source of the pain yes?

Did the human do it deliberately... maybe, but maybe not too. Either way, it hurt getting your tail stood on and without thinking you wanted to protect yourself.

Switch back into a human mindset... When someone stomps on your 'tail' accidentally or deliberately, what does your 'bite' look like? What is your venom made up of?
It's really important to know how we inflict pain upon others.

If you can't figure it out or you don't think you have a 'bite' start with what you know for sure you don't do. But you have something, you do something.
And if you still can't think of anything, if you wanted to hurt someone in a socially acceptable way (where you still looked like the good guy) what would that look like?

Deny, deny, deny.

Denying a reality you don't like doesn't change the consequences of that reality.
Phelps

"The talk" ugh

Avoiding problems is not the same as not having problems and not discussing problems doesn’t make them go away.

You're faster and slower than you think you are

We over estimate how fast we are in the short term, we underestimate how much we can achieve in the long term.

"We over estimate how much we can do in a year and under estimate how much we can do in 10 years".

Formula for success?

Success happens when hard work shakes hands with bravery and knowledge.

~ Phelps

Old V Young - which version of 'you' knows best?

"When you were young, you knew better than the old, then when you got old you knew better than the young"
Phelps

Problems, complex problems... solutions?

Complex problems often don't need complex solutions.

Stop trying to have it all with no costs - it fucks with what you have

Bad luck occurs when you want to counteractive forces to give you only their positives and neither of their negatives.

Winning with facts is fiction

Facts aren't some superpower which wins all battles, but charm might be.
Phelps

Intent verses action

Intent verses action.
Do you want to reward yourself for intent? Do you get punished' because of your actions (or lack there of)?

Maybe there needs to be an 'aware middle'

Manslaughter is probably the best example of this.
You drunk with a friend, you drive the car, they go car surfing on the roof while you drive. They come off, hit their head and subsequently die.
Was it your intent to kill them? No. But the end results of your actions caused a death.
In the courts, the difference between murder and manslaughter is intent. So clearly it matters. But someone lost a life through your actions so clearly that matters too.

Old education solving a new problem

Maybe I've been looking at education all wrong... I think it's a waste of time in a traditional sense, high fees, slow, old, rope learning, regurgitation... but maybe it's strength is it's structure, routine and accountability, thus freeing up our mind to take in more? If our will power is a finite resource drained by thought and choice, maybe it's good most choices are taken away so early on to free up space for an experienced teacher to fill it. Maybe!

The Nawing in my Head

Unhappiness comes from comparison of others. When you are compared to others you will lose,  and so will they,  there's always someone with a skill that's better than yours and you'll always have a skill that's better than there's. We just have to be the best person we can be and believe and hope that's enough for ourselves and others.

If disclosure beings connection,  then creating things you wouldn't disclose to others with someone must bring an even deeper connection.

Secrets withheld from one another create isolation.

A secret world that's a bit of a fantasy can be exciting,  personal and connecting...  But when you watch someone else do that it brings distance and loneliness.

All any of us want is to give and receive love unconditionally and feel safe to do so.

Power Over Your Problems

You gotta take responsibility for your own problems, it's not saying every problem is your fault but saying every problems' solution is up to you.

As long as you blame everything or everyone else you are saying 'I am powerless and the solution is at the mercy of others and/or circumstances

The most empowering thing you can do is own your problems so you have power to control solutions.