You've got a nasty bite... what's it like?

Imagine a snake, any snake...

Do you believe this snake hunts down humans? Like it directly seeks them out? I think we can all agree, no, otherwise snakes would be banging on our doors trying to get in.

Ok, now imagine yourself as that snake... What are you doing all day? Doing snake things like lying around, looking around, finding shelter getting warm, looking for food, looking for a mate, having snake babies...

Cool, doesn't sound too far from the average human year...

Keep imagining yourself as this snake.

Now you're minding your own business and a human steps on your tail.... what do you do?

Probably lashes out and goes to bite the source of the pain yes?

Did the human do it deliberately... maybe, but maybe not too. Either way, it hurt getting your tail stood on and without thinking you wanted to protect yourself.

Switch back into a human mindset... When someone stomps on your 'tail' accidentally or deliberately, what does your 'bite' look like? What is your venom made up of?
It's really important to know how we inflict pain upon others.

If you can't figure it out or you don't think you have a 'bite' start with what you know for sure you don't do. But you have something, you do something.
And if you still can't think of anything, if you wanted to hurt someone in a socially acceptable way (where you still looked like the good guy) what would that look like?

Stay or move?

Work where you live, or live where you work?

How do you know what's left unsaid?

How many silent agreements do you have in your life?

Post truth affirmation categories

There's only 4 arguments on the internet
1 my world (what I know and see)
2 'the' world ('facts')
3 equality (the game today)
4 equity (the game today, yesterday and tomorrow)

New addition to this in 2019

These are filtered by
1 the world how it is
2 the world how you think it ought to be
3 the world being not grasped
3 the world 'how it is' but it just ain't so

Do as I say, but I won't do it myself.

We cannot hold a trouch to light another's path without brightening our own - Ben Sweetland

How many of us tell people what they should be doing when we don't do it ourselves... It's like saying 'use my light to see' but there's no light for either of you and you both go astray.

Get your own shit in order before trying to order others.

Justification much?

Sometimes we find a reason in an action as an excuse instead of actioning a reason

Phelps

Make it about you by not making it about you

Take a breath and acknowledge that 95% of what someone else does has absolutely nothing to do with you. Yes--even if you feel that they've talked about you, misused you or done you other wrongs, still their main concern isnot you. It's them. Trust this: realizing that other people with no "investment" in you also have no "interest" in you--and that their activity probably has nothing to do with you--is a big part of forgiving and being less paranoid. So spend extra time with this one idea:"Convince yourself that the other person is pretty ignorant when it comes to you and your feelings--and so, you need not worry about them!"

Power Over Your Problems

You gotta take responsibility for your own problems, it's not saying every problem is your fault but saying every problems' solution is up to you.

As long as you blame everything or everyone else you are saying 'I am powerless and the solution is at the mercy of others and/or circumstances

The most empowering thing you can do is own your problems so you have power to control solutions.