How can you tell if someone really knows what they’re talking about?

 Ask them what they “don’t know” about the subject. If they are as enthusiastic as they were telling you what they do know, you’ve got someone who can see enough to know what they can’t see yet.

You want something better than authenticity

Authentic is the wrong word and sending us down the wrong path.

What we want from others and our entertainers are; giving full attention to the moment. Nothing else matters. The person or entertainer may not feel like doing it before hand but deciding to show up and put on a show is much better than authentically showing their true feelings any day.

You're getting old

As you get older your body talks to you, the order you get, the more it raises itself.

We're not in love anymore

Arranged marriages aren't good right!? Marry for love,  isn't that the only true way?
Is it?
I'm a middle class white male in the western world and you are only with someone because you love them right? Right?

Is Tinder the new arranged marriage? But instead of parents or culture or class or society choosing for you, you are choosing out of a lineup.  Free will,  hardly like arranged marriage right? Right? But is it still like an arranged marriage when you kind of fall into relationships because you want to be with someone...  Do you love love more than loving that person? Do you really know that person? You date on a premise - I'm wanting a relationship - I have another 10 prospects in the waiting room - it used to be like fishing, you take your time,  you fish in a certain way in a certain place at a certain time, and when you catch that right fish,  you're so excited,  it's got all your attention and energy,  nothing else matters...  Tinder is like fishing with a net...  See what crap you scoop up and dump it all to go again...  It's not a hobby like fishing is, it's now a job,  a commodity,  a slave to a system,  a treadmill...  Is dating really about love? Or desperation,  fulfilling a feeling,  a hole...
So many you don't love them - they just give you what you 'need'

While 'giving', are we really taking?

Why do you give?  Here's a test,  if you got no gratitude,  would you give? And if you got no thanks the first time,  would you do it again? And if you got insulted the second time (even though you knew it was the right thing to do) would you give again? And one more time knowing you'd never see the results of your generosity and having gained no extra power by giving...  Would you keep giving that way?

Love Is Not All You Need!!!!!!

Someone who has depression can’t function with someone who is anxious

Someone who has anxiety can’t function with someone who is depressed

Someone who is attached can’t be happy with someone who is detached

Someone who is detached can’t be happy with someone who is attached

Someone who is intense will struggle to relate with someone who is chilled

Someone who is chilled will struggle to relate with someone who is intense

Someone who wants to hide away can't be with someone who wants to be seen

Someone who wants to be seen can't be with someone who wants to hide away

Someone who works this way, will cause quarrels with someone who works that way

Someone who works that way, will cause quarrels with someone who works this way

Someone who likes action and adventure will clash with someone who likes peace and routine

Someone who likes peace and routine will clash with someone who likes action and adventure

Someone who values deep thinking can’t be content with someone who values care free

Someone who values care free can’t be content with someone who values deep thinking

Someone who has a life map planned to go east, can’t travel with someone who plans to go West

Someone who has a life map planned to go west, can’t travel with someone who plans to go East

Someone who wants to just be, can’t exist with someone who just wants to be somewhere else

Someone who wants to be somewhere else can’t exist with someone who just wants to be

Someone who needs to fly in the sky will not find delight travelling underground

Someone who needs to dig underground will not find delight flying in the sky

Someone who speaks this language can’t speak to someone with that language

Someone who speaks that language can’t speak this language

Someone who believes this is how you should live, can’t live with someone who believes this is how you shouldn't live

Someone who believes this is how you shouldn't live can’t live with someone who believes this is how you should

Someone who finds pleasure in pleasure can’t indulge with someone who doesn't find pleasure in pleasure

Someone who doesn't find pleasure in pleasure can’t indulge with someone who finds pleasure in pleasure

Someone who values security externally will not feel secure with someone who values internal security

Someone who values internal security will not feel secure with someone who values external security.

Someone who believes their love is enough can't be with someone who believes love is not all you need.

ITS ALL YOUR FAULT... that's a lie.

When I worked at Lifeline, I noticed two distinct kinds of people...  The sort that blamed everyone and everything for their problems and the other type who blamed themselves for everything and everyone else's problems.
What an awful way to live,  to genuinly believe that it's all your fault all the time... Everyone else's failures are yours,  every problem exists because there's something wrong with you...
It's a strange paradox...  To believe you are the cause and effect of everything is to say,  you matter that much, almost god like in your influence on the world...  Yet these types of people by deed and motive are the most humble and generous people on the planet.
These people think about everyone else before themselves to the point that when really important things happen,  they can collapse under pressure because they just have nothing left to give...
We all need to take care of ourselves,  take responsibility for ourselves, not others, keep ourselves strong so we can choose to help others in times of need! Be good to yourself,  be kind...  Be OK with helping yourself.

I Understand That I Don't Understand

If there is something you don't get,  you don't understand,  then you don't get it and don't understand.

http://mobile.news.com.au/national/nsw-act/dramatic-moment-miracle-baby-was-pulled-from-storm-drain-after-surviving-five-days/story-fnii5s3x-1227132456229

I'm reading this article and I'm not understanding why the mother did what she did...  Then I realised,  I don't understand because I don't understand...  Anything that happens obviously happened and everything happens for a reason regardless of if we understand or not... We will never be inside the minds of these people and few have the ability to explain why,  and even if they do,  that doesn't mean we will accept what they have to say... But once again that doesn't change that it happened and it happened for a reason regardless if we understand why,  or we don't.

Tough Love

What do you think about tough love?  I think maybe it's good for us sometimes... Do we or should we respect the person dishing it out...  I guess it depends on the motives.

There's a show called Sports Science... I'm not sure how reputable there are in the science world but they are a lot like mythbusters so I feel comfortable that their findings are accurate. The test was which coach gets the most out of their players,  the father like/praise and encouragement type,  or the pusher, punisher, aggressive to the point of abusive sometimes. Their conclusion was the latter got more out of their players. Take whatever meaning you like from that...  Maybe sports and regular life are different...  Maybe not?  Either way,  you have to push or be pushed to be great.  

Fighting unfair

Is the accusations of sexism,  racism,  homophobia ways to win arguments?

Just un-intelligent arguments to justify or enforce someone's way of life and shunning others points of difference and preferences.

Sometimes we can't articulate what we mean in an argument,  so we try to get the! 'right result' by finding other ways of winning. Just because you can't articulate as well as the other guy,  doesn't mean you're less right, but it also doesn't give you the right to find alternative hurtful points that have nothing to do with the argument you're trying to win for the sake of winning.

Fight fair.