Deny, deny, deny.

Denying a reality you don't like doesn't change the consequences of that reality.
Phelps

You are not as kind as you think you are.

If your kindness doesn't give the person receiving kindness any agency, voice or respect... It's not kindness.

kindness fails when it's disrespectful.

Sometimes we're using kindness for only selfish reasons... maybe to prop up our own image in the eyes of ourselves or of the people around us. Maybe it's control, maybe to make people feel the way you want them to feel.

Like most things, it's the honest motives that help determine, but unfortunately this is one of the easiest categories to deny because no one can really call you out... it's super ambiguous.

Why you do what you do when you don't know why you did what you did

Our 'animal' actions and reactions are shaped by our conscious and subconscious thoughts and cultural environments by either our design or by accident.

"The talk" ugh

Avoiding problems is not the same as not having problems and not discussing problems doesn’t make them go away.