Why some people are mostly normal, then go batshit crazy

It's incredibly taxing to be fighting demons day in day out and sometimes you need a rest by letting them win.

Let's see each other not as gender but as humanity.

We need to teach our sons the difference between:

a woman who compromises him and a woman who will compromise with him

a woman who will stand on him and a woman who will stand with him

a woman in need of a parent and woman in need of a partner

a woman who expects everything from him and a woman who respects everything about him

Then we need to teach our daughter's to be that women.

Men V Women.
How to tell when it's a fair point? Reverse the genders...  If the advice is both true and powerful regardless of if it's directed at male or female...  It is not about gender, rather about humanity

The difference between collective and individual.
A man raping a women is an individual action, the attitude towards it is collective.
A women belittles a man to the point of suicide is individual action, our response is collective. Both are important,  but to swap individual and collective is deadly.

A man who raped a women turning into a collective is men can't be trusted, all are potential rapists...  Then a man defends that he and others like him are a good guy with the swap,  he is now and individual which means he holds no weight or authority only making him and his kind more guilty.

We may never get rid of individuals actions,  but our goal as a collective is to be surprised about male / female inequality, to be surprised when a man does something to a women (or the other way round) that we are surprised and shocked that a women got attacked at night in a park by herself...  Let's be surprised as a collective that a man does something bad against a women and distrust the individual not the whole gender.

"People can't give you what they don't have"

A couple of interesting quotes that got me thinking...

"People can't give you what they don't have"

How many times do we want something and want someone to give it to us when deep down we know they can't - like someone admitting they are wrong but they will never have the ability to see that,  or a mother wanting their child to be super grateful for the sacrifices she made,  but they'll never reach that realisation to the degree the mother wants, or the daughter wanting a close relationship to the astranged father when he's never had a healthy relationship in his life, or a woman who has been abused by a man and wants her partner to give back what she's lost...  Or maybe a husband wants his wife to understand him more, but she is who she is and would have to change who she is to understand or 'get him' more... Which leads me to an interesting second quote...
Antero Alli, an obscure author, wrote, “communication is only possible between equals"
Do you agree? I try to learn how to think dumber so I can communicate with 'dumb' people...This quote sums up what I am trying to do,  I was trying to be like the person I wanted to communicate with... Maybe that's why so few can communicate in a relationship, many seem unbalanced,  which we jokingly describe as 'who wears the pants' with that quote alone you are saying you are not equal,  one has power while the other follows... Maybe it's time to be equal,  and if you can't, try to be equal in the moment...

Sluts are not sluts.

Maybe women shouldn't be told 'don't' to seeking the touch of a man regularly...  Maybe other girls judge and 'educate' their friends,  daughters,  sisters,  strangers.  And maybe women should stop coming to the defence of other women about how others comment on their body...  Why?  Well I've realised that we let in the world in different ways,  we learn different ways,  we value different things and find identity in things that may surprise ourselves. 
I've always wondered why some girls find offence to flattering their physical appearance while others value it...  Of course there's different degrees and contexts,  but without going through every detail,  there is a general pattern of some girls liking it more than others.  I've known for a while about identity being the root to most behaviors and choices,  and I've also known about the 'love language' concept.

If you are unfamiliar...  I got this list and definition from 5 love languages in no particular order.

Physical Touch

This language isn't all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face – they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Physical touch fosters a sense of security and belonging in any relationship.

Words of Affirmation

Actions don't always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, "I love you," are important – hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. Kind, encouraging, and positive words are truly life-giving.

Quality Time

In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, "I love you," like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there – with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby – makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Quality Time also means sharing quality conversation and quality activities.

Receiving Gifts

Don't mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous – so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are visual representations of love and are treasured greatly.

Acts of Service

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an "Acts of Service" person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: "Let me do that for you." Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don't matter. Finding ways to serve speaks volumes to the recipient of these acts.

So back to my point which I haven't really made yet.  Some women need...  Like really need,  physical touch...  So they're physical bodies are important to them maybe more than others...  Maybe they are an audio person too...  Likes praise on their physical points through sound and backed up with touch?  It doesn't mean they are a slut,  it doesn't mean they lack self control compared to others...  They just have a disposition...  We even learn and take in the world in 3 different ways,  through hearing,  seeing and or doing,  often one is much more important for the other two...  So leave chicks alone who like to touch...  Because we all have the same driving force.  To love,  and to be loved... In our own way!

Inner world, outer world

What if you had no way of saying what you had to say,  or showing how you feel,  demonstrating your meaning or even having no way of letting others know you 'exist'

www.sbs.com.au/news/article/2014/10/14/it-was-being-buried-alive-what-its-have-locked-syndrome

Although this is the most extreme example,  I believe most of us in some way have trouble communicating ... And in the western world that my perspective comes from,  who ever articulates best is right...  But are they?  Just because someone is better at rationalization does that make them more right than the person that can't say what they're trying to say?