The left are actually conservatives

You're a conservative.

We're all conservative

Not politically

To conserve past good to keep intact for the future.

What's good from the past worth keeping?

Liberal progressive are we at the best point ever in human history for you? Is the world the best it's ever been? It should be by progressive logic, we're better today than yesterday. If that doesn't feel true then you're a conservative, that some things at some point in the past was better, therefore it's good to conserve.

You can't say it's really bad today, everything is broken and the best it's ever been in everything. Both things can't be true.

If you think they can exist together, then humanity can never get any worse by it's own hand.

Catch this for a better life

 The amount of good things in your life depends on your ability to notice them.

I'm some way, ever map is wrong

 https://youtu.be/LCUImXuwaUw?si=RyiJWaesXDPGPLHW

Bad people gonna bad

 “Comparing your best to their worst” It's all just a slider, where you want one comparison to start and one to end. Everyone is tweaking the positioning sliders to suit what they're trying to argue. That's why without some basic shared realities we can't be stable on common ground.

How about 10% of “manosphere” is bad? 25% 33%? 

How about 7% of “feminists” have sinister motives, 15% 33%?

Bad people gonna bad. Greedy people gonna greed, power driven people gonna play. They use the power and culture structures of society for their advantage.

You've hoodwinked into believing there's good over here and bad over there and forever seperate the two. Good can attract the bad and the bad can seduce the good.

It's easy to point to a problem. It's hard to improve a situation. Here's my sincere attempt (a private activity) - “what's their name?”. Name people in your circles, in your spheres. Not the infamous outliers, your world. ‘Men are like this…’ What's their name. ‘Women do this…’ What's their name? ‘Society tells me…’ What's their name? 'I heard that...' What's their name? 'People are so mean...' What's their name?

If you can name people and they know your name, that problem is very real and it's at home. But if you can't name any… …

What's more tasteful than taste that's the opposite of taste?

Playing in the sand of subjectivity is important but maybe there's something more important...

In touch disgust

AI might pretend it has taste but it shows its hand with lacking discernment of what's on the nose.

Preventing your WW3

 

From a lawyer

There is something I wish I'd understood much earlier in my legal career.

I used to prepare for what I thought should happen.

The reasonable outcome.

The logical response.

The thing any rational person would obviously do.

And then I'd watch someone do the exact opposite.

Reject an excellent settlement.

Spend $20,000 fighting over something worth $5,000.

Make an accusation that could easily be disproven.

Create another problem when everyone was finally close to resolution.

I'd think:

Why would anyone do that?

Eventually I realized I was asking the wrong question.

Stop Predicting What Makes Sense

Start predicting what makes sense to them.

That's completely different.

If you're dealing with a high-conflict personality, don't ask:

"What would a reasonable person do next?"

Ask:

"What does this person have an incentive to do next?"

That question has saved me more times than I can count.

Because people don't necessarily make decisions based on what is objectively best.

They make decisions based on what they value.

Control.

Money.

Status.

Privacy.

Winning.

Avoiding embarrassment.

Punishing someone.

Protecting a narrative.

Keeping access to you.

Those incentives can be completely different from yours.

Here's Something You Can Do Today

I call this the Incentive Test.

Take the person on the other side of your conflict and answer four questions:

1. What do they SAY they want?

Write it down.

2. What does their BEHAVIOR suggest they want?

This is usually much more interesting.

3. What are they trying hardest to avoid?

Expense?

Exposure?

A deposition?

Losing control?

A particular person seeing certain information?

Uncertainty?

4. What would make resolution more attractive than continued conflict?

Now you're thinking strategically.

You're no longer predicting behavior based on what you would do.

You're looking at the world from their side of the chessboard.

Fucked over? Here's how

DARVO meaning

Deny = Reject what you’re saying, change the frame, gaslight.
Attack = Move away from the original point to whatever puts you on the defensive. Destroy your credibility.
Reverse victim and offender = Reposition themselves as the victim. Recast you as the villain and moral wrongdoer, so the whole story is rewritten around what you supposedly did to them, making their retaliation seem justified to themselves and onlookers.

DARVO always wins when it's just people talking. Complicated truths can't compete against simple lies and moving goalposts.

Delete it's a bigger skill

Dan Pink

 Since ChatGPT launched, the number of new books published each year has tripled. Researchers at Cornell and the University of Minnesota looked at what all that abundance actually produced — and found that as output soared, average quality sank.

Here's the thing: that's not an argument against AI. It's a map of where the value is moving. When producing almost anything becomes nearly free, production stops being the scarce skill. Judgment becomes the scarce skill — knowing what's worth making, what's worth fixing, and what's worth deleting.

And taste isn't something you're born with. It's something you build. Read better stuff. Notice why the good work is good. Be willing to toss your own B-minus drafts before anyone sees them. The machines can generate endlessly. Deciding what deserves to exist is still our job.

Follow @danielpink for more on how work is actually changing — and what to do about it.

#ai #creativity #taste #writing #danielpink

The cost of humility

 The cost of humility

https://youtube.com/shorts/gWrgQIThVBA?si=evzVxIJWQCz5lwJg

The problem is this only works if you've got a baseline of acceptance from inside and out. You can't put that full load on someone who doesn't have the strength to carry that - All men were once children. Some did not have an environment to establish this baseline. A wild animal will attack if corned because it's in their nature. Hurting people hurt people. (If you have the capacity) Lift up others even if they can't lift back.

3 months deep later

 https://www.facebook.com/share/r/1GE3mRPpGW/?mibextid=wwXIfr

All good blog streaks must come to an end. 

I've been thinking more about thinking and human behaviour than any other state of my life and yet my blog history will show this time of my life as the least engaged. I guess typing this now solves that

Trap yourself to shitness

 Adam Lane Smith

I want to share something that changed how I think about transformation.

It has to do with why some people change fast, and others stay stuck for years even when they're doing all the “right” things.

Your nervous system is constantly scanning your surroundings for signs of safety or danger. This happens automatically, completely outside your awareness.

When it picks up a threat cue (a tone of voice, a facial expression, a pattern it recognizes), walls go up.

And here's the part most people miss:

You cannot build new secure patterns while your nervous system is stuck in stress mode.

It's not possible.

So when you try to change in the same environment that created your patterns - surrounded by the same triggers, the same stress, the same people who activate you - your nervous system never calms down enough to learn something new.

This is why you can know exactly what you should do… and still repeat the same patterns.

It's an environment problem.

There are some people in your life who have an unconscious investment in you staying exactly where you are because your patterns serve their patterns.

Your anxiety makes them feel needed. Your avoidance gives them space they're afraid to ask for. Your chaos keeps them in control.

When you try to change around these people, you're not just fighting your own nervous system. You're fighting theirs too. Their nervous system reads your growth as a threat - and without even realizing it, they pull you back into the familiar dynamic.

This is why environment matters so much.

Life is now content

 I started in media in 06 and my life became the inspiration for content. Note everyone is their own media company.

If you're going to do it. Do it cheap, do it easy, do it well. Scratch the itch. Don't need a rake when fingernails are fine.

This is perfect!

https://youtu.be/LicrMCoTP-4?si=rIY-92ktkXbEC6DS

Trap yourself to greatness

 The environment changing is more powerful than anything else. If you want change, start with the environment and it's conditions.

Funny story of a guy being put into a situation, and instead of backing out, the environment he was now in motivated him to do crap no other amount of learning, self help, inspiration, encouragement etc could do

https://youtube.com/shorts/MZaDyo5p06A?si=Motd3FiOeHZ3GPo5

Topic crimes...

 Exploring something doesn't mean advocating for that something.

"Exploring it doesn't mean advocating for it"

Approaching it from a different angle does not mean I am advocating for its antithesis.

There's magic everywhere, it's just not called that

 "Simple but exceptional"

House chores propaganda

 The thing that bothers me about household chores is that they’re often driven by emotion rather than necessity. One person “feels like” something needs to be done - whether out of disgust, shame, judgment, or anxiety about control - and then gets frustrated when the other person doesn’t share the same urgency. But the proof that it’s not actually self-evident is that if you ask them to do it first, or to do more, they often don’t feel like it either.

That’s why people who aren’t emotionally driven to do these tasks deserve appreciation—because they’re changing their behaviour to accommodate someone else’s feelings, not because the task is inherently urgent.